7/26/2003 09:53:09 AM|||Travis|||

Tough morning that was highlighted by low blood sugar for the second morning in a row. It kind of makes you feel very lethargic, like you don't want to get out of bed, even though have have just slept for ten hours. I also ran out of water as well, so my body was in a horrid state of disrepair- dehydrated as well as without enough sugar to operate properly.

Systems are back online now, blood sugar is at 150 and climbing and water levels are increasing throughout my body. All systems normal.

I just got back from a spiritual vacation up in Berkeley with my best friend, Yon. We went out to a two thousand year old forest that has 300 foot redwood trees- a very interesting place indeed. I thought of this forest as an enchanted forest so to speak, because it had grown up so large. I put it all in the perspective of simcity. Simcity is a game where you zone of certain sectors of a town and see what kinds of cool buildings pop up (in a nutshell) and this is what was happening around Berkeley. Even the trees had thought it was an ideal place to setup shop, and they have been thriving there for a couple thousand years. Its no wonder that San Francisco sprung up right around this spot- it was great real estate. Even nature can appreciate that.

By spiritual vacation, what I mean is that I was able to distance my mind from "common sense" and was able to analyize what I was thinking on a much grander vision. I was able to see where I was headed and how I could change that trajectory whenever I wanted.

It all boils down to the now. The past and the future are both fluid, in the sense that they can be changed. Memorys can be created or destoryed, strengthend, weakendend- modified in a sense. And so can the future. The now is a constant question I see being asked, and it can be boiled down to yes or no. Should I clean up the house or just watch tv? Should I start writing this journal entry or go back to bed?

It seems to me that there is a constant train switching station that our "now" is at. We can either switch one way or the other, and it will always have reprocutions down the line. What we do now is like a seed that we plant for the future.

Isn't this what Jesus did when he changed the world?

I feel like I am writing a story that has already been told- like the guy in the PKD novel. That is the one about a mystery novelest that starts writing a story and then finding himself in the story. The same events he writes about start to actualy happen. It is then that he goes to a priest and tells him what is going on and the priest tells the man that he has just described the book of Acts. So it is like our lives are a continual story being written that we have the power to change. Our lives could be a story of greatness or weakness- the choice is eternally up to how we deal with the now.

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